Apparently, I am a mummy blogger. I am not sure when this happened. I can't deny it is true. I am a mum. I blog. It stands to reason that I have entered the club of parental blogdom.
It is a large club. All the members I've spoken to are lovely, friendly and willing to offer advice and help. I've had many a happy twitter conversation with a fellow mummy blogger.
Yet, I still feel like an interloper. A gate crasher at a wedding. A fraud. A fake. A phoney. A bad Cliff Richard impersonator at Wimbledon.
To explain these feelings, we need to travel back in time to when this blog was born.
In April 2012, I was just starting back at work after 3 months off with depression. I was trying to get back to normal life and I was having therapy to address some of my issues.
I like to think I am a positive person. But it isn't always true. I suffer badly from negative thinking. My therapist suggested that I needed to find a way to remember what makes me happy. Thus, Mrs H's Favourite Things was born.
This blog became part of my therapy. I didn't think about my readers or statistics. I blogged when I felt like it or when I had an event that I wanted to record.
Zoom forward to the present day and my blog has grown and evolved. Once more it has become a form of therapy. It has become my link to a bigger world. It has become my proof that I am not just a mum and a wife. I have more to offer.
Over the past month I have been spending more time writing posts, giving the blog a spruce up and embracing social media. I also did research on what it takes to become a successful blogger.
This research scared me. A lot of the paraphenelia that comes with blogging just isn't me. I could spend hours ensuring that my blog has perfect search engine optimisation and is the most beautifully designed blog around. If I do that I run the risk of losing me. I worry that I won't know who the Mrs H in Mrs H's Favourite Things really is.
Dear reader, I hope that you enjoy my posts. I hope you like them because they are honest and come from the heart. I hope you like them because they contain a little piece of me. I hope you like them because they are a little rough around the edges. I hope you like them because just like me they aren't perfect but they are genuine.
And I hope you'll stick around as this blog continues to grow and develop. It would be lovely to get to know you.
Hugs
Mrs H
xxxx
P.S. I would love to hear your thoughts. Do you do anything that makes you feel like a fake?
P.P.S. Depite feeling like this I appear to be attending Mumsnet's Blogfest on Saturday 8th November 2014. Wish me luck and a big dose of courage.
P.P.P.S I have linked this post up to a number of linkys including the fabulous @SundayStars. A linky run by a number of fabulous bloggers including myself. Steph from Diary of a Midlife Mummy and I are your hosts for this week.
Really interesting to hear how people got starting with blogging. I'm glad it helped you through a difficult time. In all honesty, some of my favourite blogs aren't the ones with the flashy designs or thousands of followers. They are usually the more 'low-key' (for lack of a better word) blogs, with nicely written and honests posts. Posts I can relate to. Keep doing what you're doing Mrs H! xx
ReplyDelete#weeklylinky
Thank you so much for your lovely comment Jenna. I too prefer more low key posts - that portray an actual human person and not a super mummy! I love your blog for that reason. You are honest and genuine and that comes through in your writing. Take care and I look forward to more posts on http://www.tinyfootsteps.co.uk. Hugs Mrs H xxxx
DeleteI feel the same! 2 months in and I am overwhelmed by it all. My posts are rough around the edges too and I am always shocked that people actually view my blog!! haha!
ReplyDeleteI like your posts, I like that you are just a mummy doing a blog. Same as me :-)
#weeklylinky
I love your posts because they are so very you, and when I don't get to see you enough, they give me my dose of your voice. Until I started reading, I never realised how beautifully eloquent you are.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, to the question at hand.... I feel like a fake grown up! I may have a house, pension, dependent (ok, hamster but she still needs me) and yet still waiting for adult to happen! I don't really know what it looks like, so I'll just have to fake it til it happens.....
Ahhhh darling lady. This just put the biggest smile on my face. You are such a wonderful friend and I miss you. It always made my day going for lunch with you or bumping into you at the CRUK canteen. Those were the days! I don't think that I'll ever feel like an adult. I still look at Little Miss H and wonder how the hell I became a mummy (don't answer that!!!). I don't feel able to look after myself let alone another human being. I hope you'll be able to hear my "beautiful eloquence" in person soon. Love you! Hugs Mrs H xxxx
DeleteAhhhh, Katy thanks for reading my post and commenting. Please don't feel overwhelmed. I can see why you do (as I often to do - I still have no idea about SEO). I am sure like me you started writing your blog because you want to document your life and record those lovely family moments. I've decided that I am just going to keep that in mind. As you say, I am a mummy writing a blog. But my main and most important job is to be a wife and mummy. That will always come first. Take care and thanks for being so lovely. Hugs Mrs H xxxx
ReplyDeleteI think the most beautiful thing you can do is to keep being honest with yourself - blog about things you like and want to write about, not because you want to attract readers. At least I enjoy reading blogs that are written with passion! But if I can sense that the blog text is there just to make me click more and more links and it's all really "commercial".. I shy away from such things. I think you have a beautiful blog and what have I read so far, I like your honest writing style. Keep that up!
ReplyDeletePs. What makes us mummy bloggers? Is it because we are mums and we blog, or is there bigger elements out there - like the need to write about our children or so? I've been thinking about the description of "mummy blogger" lately a lot - what it means as a theme, what does it mean to be a mummy blogger? :D
Oh, and I "challenged" you in my most recent blog post! I hope to read your answers soon.. ;) http://www.meriannen.com/en/11-questions-blog-challenge/
xxx
I was thinking more this in bed last night as I was waiting for the sleep and listening to the thunder.. And I realized, that as English isn't my first language it feels somehow "fake" for me to blog using this language that I have learned but not used since childhood. Even if I'm fluent in it and don't have problems to express myself with it, it.. just doesn't feel the same than summing up feelings and experiences in my own native language. Does that make any sense? xx
DeleteHey Meriannen. Thanks so much for your lovely comments. I am really glad that you enjoyed the post. I also get put off blogs that are very commercial. I understand that for many blogging is their job and they have to do PR collaborations. But it feels a little try hard to me and doesn't sit with the ethos of their blogs.
DeleteI really love your blog and think your writing is brilliant. I am in awe of you having two blogs - one in Finnish and one in you second language. I could never do that! I can barely speak English!!! I can understand why you feel that you English blog is somehow "fake". it certainly doesn't come across that way when reading it. It is a lovely and genuine blog.
Thanks also for tagging me in the questions. I'll have to get my thinking cap on and write up the answers at ome point over the next week.
Take care. Hugs Mrs H xxxx
I think every blog is therapy for the person writing it (there's a need to get something out). And just as we change over time, it's perfectly fine for a blog to change (or not!). It's easy to be scared by the world of mummy blogging - some people take it far too seriously for my liking, but then that's their perogative :) Staying true to your own voice is the most important thing for me and with that comes true and quality readers!
ReplyDelete(By the way, I feel like I fake most of my life...) xx
Hello. Thank you for this great comment. I totally agree that many forms of writing are therapy for the author. As you say, "a need to get something out". It seems a lot better to me than holding all your emotions in.
DeleteWriting that post and reading all the lovely comments has reinforced my decision to remain true to myself. To write and post because I want to and I feel that I have something interesting to say. If my blog ends up with lots of loyal readers as a result - then that is brilliant but it is not going to be my aim.
Hugs Mrs H xxxx
PS I feel a fake too. Sometimes being me feels like I am playing a part in a play that I don't know the end of. That Mr Shakespeare was a very smart man when he wrote the "all the world's a stage" speech. x
Lovely post :) I think it's easy to get caught up with the 'mummy blogger' label and then worry about getting enough views, being active enough on social media, whether the blog looks 'slick' enough etc. But it depends why you start blogging in the first place. If it is to be a professional mummy blogger and (somehow!) make money, then those are things to focus on. If it's for love of writing or to record life or whatever, you just happen to be a mum who blogs! I'm definitely in the second camp but that doesn't mean I don't get a bit sidetracked by the other things sometimes!! (And I'm totally with Miss M above - I feel like a fake grown up all the time, even with baby no 2 on the way!) #weeklylinky
ReplyDeleteHello. Thank you so much for dropping by and taking the time to leave a lovely comment. It is nice to know that I am not the only person who feels like a fake grown up. I really don't feel old enough to be making decisions about another human being.
DeleteAfter writing this, I would say that I am in the second camp too. We will have to keep each other company. Iam definitely just a mum who blogs. And you know what - I'm really happy with that.
Take care
Hugs Mrs xxxx
Hi lovely ;) Great to hear why you got into it. It is a large world in blogging isn't it? I didn't realise that either, however I blog about anything that comes into my head. My 'style' keeps changing but its nothing planned, and I LOVE it and thats all that matters. Yours is great and I enjoy reading your posts a lot x
ReplyDeleteHello lovely lady. Thanks for stopping by again. It is always lovely to see you here. I LOVE your blog too. I think you have such a natural writing style and that is really important. I am definitely going to stay true to myself and blog because I want to - not because I feel compelled too. Hopefully, people will continue to drop by and read my posts. But if not then at least my husband and my mum read it. Ha ha. Thanks for the lovely words. *Smile*.
DeleteHugs
Mrs H xxxx
The mummy blogging world is a little overwhelming isn't it.I only started my blog last month and I feel like a teeny tiny fish in big pond wondering how and if anyone will ever read my posts! I do it for fun though, and it'll be nice for my son to look back on it and see all the fun stuff we got up to when he was a littleun :) x
ReplyDeleteHello. Thanks so much for your comment. The mummy blogging world is overwhelming but it is also hugely supportive. There are lots of mums out there who will help you. As long as you continue to write for you and not try to please other people then you'll do great. Have fun! Hugs Mrs H xxxx
DeleteHey Mrs H. This is such a lovely post - it really comes from the heart and shows us a little more of who you are and why you're here. I know what you mean about being an intruder or stalker of some in my case, but I suppose this is just how we all have to start out. I sound pretty similar to you with the whole negative thought stuff (I also saw a therapist) and I think this is a brilliant outlet. I'm loving hearing your stories, so keep going lovely. Xx
ReplyDeleteHello. Thank you for such a lovely comment. It made me feel quite emosh when I first saw it. I really love blogging. But the whole blogging world can feel really over-whelming. I have been so busy over the past week and I have felt very guilty that I haven't been able to blog more. I worry far too much about statistics and followers. I just need to relax and enjoy it. But it helps to have such lovely blogging friends, like your gorgeous self. Hugs Mrs H xxxx
DeleteI love your blog, and I love the insight I have into what makes you, you. I feel like a fraud with my blog as I don't feel like I know what I am doing with it. I just write it and then feel a bit out of my depth when people are talking about side bars and SEO.
ReplyDeleteKeep writing as you do as I love to read your blog x
Ahhhh, lovely Karen. Thank you for your comment. I don't really know aht I am doing either. SEO confuses me and seems to involve a lot of effort. I think I'll stick to what I know and love; writing! Hugs Mrs H xxxx
DeleteIve only just found Your blog but will definitely e catching up soon. I started my blog for similar reasons
ReplyDeleteHello. It is great to know that lots of people started their blogs when life was hard and they needed a way out. Sometimes blogging can be a lifeline. I hope to see you back here soon. Hugs Mrs H xxxx
DeleteI know how you feel about feeling a bit of a fraud i do to ohwell you no what they say fake it till you make it! xx
ReplyDeleteHi Amy. "Fake it to you make it" is my mantra. It seems fitting that I should apply it to my blog. Thanks for reading and commenting. Hugs Mrs H xxxx
DeleteMy blog is my therapy too http://youbabymemummy.com/pnd/blogging-as-therapy/ I am so glad you found your blog and that it has helped you. Also glad that I got to meet you xxx #SundayStars
ReplyDeleteAby, thanks so much for commenting. I am always amazed but happy that lots of people find writing a blog therapeutic. It can be a great release. I love your blog too. It always makes me smile, It was great to meet you too and pick your brain about all things blogging. Hugs Mrs H xxxx
DeleteLovely post and I feel like I'm faking it too a lot of the time! I go through stages of trying to be a super blogger, then get a bit disillusioned and go back to what I enjoy most about blogging... Babbling on about life and whatever is in my head :) hope you enjoyed blogfest, I am yet to brave a blogging conference... Not sure I have the guts :) xx #sundaystars
ReplyDeleteHello Caroline. Thanks so much for visiting and for taking the time to comment. It is so hard to be a super blogger. like you, when I get bogged down in all the stresses and strains of blogging then I fall out of love with it. But after a few days away I am always desperate for more. Hugs Mrs H xxxx
DeleteThis is such a fab post and is exactly how I feel, like I'm just pretending to be a mummy blogger! I started the blog so as not to forget the little things of Oliver growing up and I need to remember I blog for me as a fun hobby as sometimes I get really stressed about a certain post being up in time etc! Thank you for helping me to remember what its all about and thanks for hosting #sundaystars Becky xx
ReplyDeleteHello Becky. It is lovely to see you here and thank you for commenting. I try really hard to remember that I blog for a hobby but sometimes it des become addictive and I stay up to ridiculous hours finishing a post. Now I aim to write one post a week. If I write more than that then that is fab. If not, then I start again the next week. I think your blog is great so continue as you are. Hugs Mrs H xxxx
DeleteFab post to read all over again honey (nearly just wrote 'homey' instead there - thank god I spotted it!! - you'd have thought me a right idiot!!) I think its a brilliant idea to look back at previous posts and see where we've come from and how we've grown. Just lovely. love Steph xxx #SundayStars
ReplyDeleteAhhh Steph. I really wish you had have written 'homey'. I would have loved to be called that in my comments. It would make me sound cool. Thanks for reading this post again and for commenting. You are a star. Hugs Mrs H xxxx
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